To protect the identity of the individual certain things have been edited out, and the message has been segmented into the following statements.
A Lovely Empath (who we will call Blessing) writes;
First off, thank you for writing me. Secondly thank you for the question, there’s a lot of information here, and the #5 question is the Big Question, right? It took me a lifetime, the support of friends, a lot of education, and many layers of experience to answer that for myself. There will be pieces and parts that are specific to you, but I’m going to try and give you an answer of quality within length of a blog post.
1) “I sense a power in the ability, but I too consider it more a curse than blessing as I haven't found a particular use for it that compensates for the negative energy that sickens me.”
I think we all feel this daily, there’s always a presence of illness in and around us. I attribute this to the general well being of society. We are not a giving or loving society, we take from nature without asking or putting back, and as a species our conflicts are still decided by force. With that said, think of your ability as an Empath like the receiver for radio stations, and your receiver is tuned into a bandwidth where the stations that you are most likely to receive are tuned with the signals that you are most likely to put out (Empathic Resonance). In the prior post I illuded to this as Empathic Karma. It’s a Universal Truth that what we put into this world, we in turn are most likely to receive. Being Empathic is no different, so the short answer is to strengthen yourself to level up your resonance / bandwidth so that you pick up less of the spam (radio station adds) that you’d rather not receive (More on this below in the response to #5).
2) “I feel like a sponge, so I prefer to limit time with a lot of people and avoid the negative ones entirely.”
I do too, and in that way work from home has been a blessing and a curse for me. As I continue to slide away from society and shelter myself in my home; I’m Emphatically more comfortable, and it’s getting harder to assimilate to society when I need to get out. When I get stuck in questions / situations like this, I like to look at the relationship between odds. Yin and Yang are my favorite way to do this because it backs up to Eastern Theory where Empaths are celebrated as the connective tissue of the greater human experience.
So; (Yin), I avoid the bulk of society, because society hurts me. I avoid the negative individuals that are around me, because they hurt me. This is in an effort to protect me and provide myself comfort.
This is great and at times 100% necessary. We should place self-care at the top of the list.
Ok; (Yang), I avoid the bulk of society, because society hurts me. I often lose out on opportunities and relationships that I’m ultimately unaware of due to my choices around self-protection. I know there are people and relationships out there, but I don’t trust them, and if I’m really honest, I don’t’ trust myself to pursue them in a healthy way.
This is where I introduce the concept of Tribe. Humans are born social and thrive in social environments, we as Empaths must at the very least have our Empath tribe. As we find comfort there, we need to start to take down our walls toward the remainder of society as we grow stronger in our individual efforts. As for the negative people that you know you can’t be around, let’s hope they are not your significant other, children, or boss, but even then we can make choices and if needed cord cut negativity out of our lives.
3) “I have a strong telepathy with my mother that we've been referred to as twins because we're so in sync.”
This is awesome, and I too have amazing connections with most people that I’ve come in contact with. These connections span amazing distances, have stood the test of time and when we speak over the phone or in person the conversations usually start out with; “I was just thinking about you”. Lean into this, and appreciate it, this can be a grounding block for you. Even better news, you will most likely not lose this connection as time goes on because you’ve already stated a connection to the other side.
Connections to the other side can be fickle depending on things like openness, family politics (I lost a Spirit Guide due to this), and reincarnation (they are out there in diapers somewhere, but the signal reboots). Then you have those who are seemingly always there, looking on, taking negativity off of you and giving you strength (beautiful and cherished, and I do rely on a core group daily).
4) “I've seen a full ghost. Others have said they felt strange in that area too, but as far as I now, I'm the only one to have seen her. So for whatever reason, being an empath makes me sensitive to energy of many kinds.”
Concerning the apparition (In addition to the information provided in #3); they may have shown themselves to you because they know you can see. They may be reaching out to you, because they know you can communicate. For me, it works like an old school rolodex filled with pre-written cards. The rolodex get’s spun, the card get’s read like a “Pop In” statement or question inserted into my head. In your case, you have the power of physical sight (very cool, only once for me). If you are strong enough in the moment, provide a thought response, if they need help they may ask, if it spooks them, they will most likely leave and avoid. In either case, providing them compassion and love, in place of fear and resentment will lighten the load for you both. Consider Ho’oponopono (Hawaiian Conflict Resolution technique) as a practice to clear the air and relieve some tension. State; “I’m Sorry, Forgive Me, Thank You, I Love You”. Do this first with them in mind, and second with you in mind to clear your personal space. As you grow stronger and in the case closer to the apparition, then continue the line of positivity. The old adage that you can’t hate someone who is always nice to you plays out wonderfully here. This will most likely take pressure off your Mom too.
Personally in my current residence I helped to clear a lost spirit (passed child in tremendous pain and confusion) who was left behind due to an unideal family situation by the prior owners after the child's passing. The sale of the home was a point of contention, and rushed due to familial ties being broken, and the child was not able to move for lack of being able to choose, within the broken family unit. I felt this while moving our belongings into the home. I was able to call on one of my Spirit Guides (A gentile soul, a second father to me who passed years back) as a guide to this individual, and we together lit sage and guided them from the residence to a better place. The Child is at peace now and I feel very blessed to have been able to help.
Sage / Sage oil / can work temporarily, but if a spirit considers a place home they will stay there against force. Bringing on assistance from the other side and providing peace and positivity is a gentile way to sooth and progress the soul.
I don’t speak about this in the book to this level, or provide my recent personal experience, so thank you for the excellent question. I suppose it didn’t make the book, because I’m still not 100% comfortable with this piece of me; again thank you for allowing me the opportunity to reason through that and reference this beautiful resolution.
5) How are you able to stop or control the flow of energy around you?
This took a lifetime of work, but the other side is so beautiful. That’s why I wrote the book. Some quick wins are the thing you most likely know about, clearing your space, grounding, and my favorite Cardio. Then you may not know about like a Q-Link to strengthen your independent signal, or an Ionic bath to pull toxins and energies out of your body. Science and grounding has helped us, but it can’t remove the love / sensitivity / beauty from within us, so we ultimately have to settle up with society and how we interact with it / respond to it. We do this through understanding and personal growth.
In my book I set out 21 steps, Step #2 is; “I understand that my Empathic abilities are a gift provided through a spirit that is within me. My gift was given so that I may be able to help others. I must become strong enough. I will dedicate right now to heling myself, with the assistance and strength of the spirit.”
Step #1 has to do with sobriety and unhealthy relationships, so you can see just how important how we see our gift is, to the reality of our gift. If you view something as negative or positive, you will want to be right, so eventually you’ll drive yourself into that result, just to say to yourself; “I told you so”. Being right to prove a point in a negative way does us no good, but we do it all of the time.
Blessing, I would like to invite you to our Facebook support group “Empath Love Resource Group”. It’s the one with very few members, but we have a lot of strength in our foundation. Posting this there would most likely result in the shotgun effect of love and support, with some sprinkling of advice in there. This is the expected result of any Facebook group of quality.
With that said, I truly appreciate the opportunity to write to you today. Yes, somedays It’s going to feel like a curse, but let’s replace 80% of those days with blessing, and wonder, and the strength to help others. When that happens you’ll be free, and faced with so much love on a daily basis that it can be overwhelming. Let’s get there together.
Much Love Blessing,
“If you have come to help me, you are wasting your time. If you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.”
Lilla Watson, an Australian Aboriginal Elder